


The Wounds Love Leaves Behind

by asmyviolingentlyweeps



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Bottom!Cas, Dirty Talk, Light Bondage, M/M, Masturbation, Mpreg, Oral Fixation, Self Lubrication, Size Kink, Spanking, top!dean
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-21
Updated: 2013-08-10
Packaged: 2017-12-09 03:42:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/769567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asmyviolingentlyweeps/pseuds/asmyviolingentlyweeps
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean Winchester blew into town like a hurricane, and left just as fast with as much damage as one too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

00\. New Home, Same Old Story

“I don’t understand why we couldn’t just stay with Bobby,” Sam pouted sinking farther down in the back seat of their Impala, watching the fall-hued scenery flash by them as they left Souix Falls for yet another new town a few states away.

“I’ve already told you Sam, Bobby can’t watch you guys all the time, it’s not fair on him,” John said with an exasperated sigh, “You guys aren’t little kids anymore, Dean can watch after you just fine now for a few weeks while I’m away on a hunt,”

“But dad-”

“Sammy just leave it,” Dean finally butted in on the rising argument, too tired to deal with their shit as he lit up a cigarette, “We’ll see Bobby again,”

“Maybe,” Sam muttered darkly under his breath, pulling his bag into his lap and fishing out his old and frayed copy of The Great Gatsby.

 

Dean looked at the two story building that was the high school, his hand ruffling Sammy’s hair affectionately as they walked to the entrance, “Could be worse right, Sammy?”

“Could be better,” He said, angrily shoving Dean away, “Let’s just get this over with,”

Dean sighed and shook his head, winking at a group of cheerleaders in uniform as they waited for the doors to be open as they walked by.  The girls giggled and whispered to themselves, pointing with smiles.  One of them stared openly with a flirtatious look in her pale yellow eyes.

Dean saw Sammy to his first class before heading for his own on the other side of the building with a whisper to, “Play nice with the other kids, and makes some friends,”

“Why we’re just gonna leave again,”

Dean rolled his eyes and pushed Sammy into the classroom, “Just… be good, Sammy, ok?”

“Sure whatever,”

 

“Would you like to explain to the class why you decided my class wasn’t worth getting to on time?”

Dean bit his tongue and looked at the ceiling, ignoring the old biddy of a teacher who’s frazzled brown hair had seen much better days, he smirked and said, “Nope,”

“Go take a seat, Mr. Winchester,”

Dean smiled as he scanned the room, almost missing the lone open desk in the back for the beauty that sat next to it.  He was easily shorter than Dean, with short but riotously curly black hair and the kind of blue eyes that sang of waters’ uncharted depths.  Dean walked with purpose to the seat and plopped down, giving the boy a once over before leaning over and whispering conspiritively.

“Hi, I’m Dean,”

“Hello Dean,” He said back, eyes flickering to the new student, “My name is Castiel,”

“Castiel, huh?” Dean smirked, “Ain’t that some kind of angel name?”

“No, close, but no.  You’re thinking of Cassiel,” He said, trying to keep from staring at the new kid – Dean, he mussed in the back of his mind – was he trying to get his ass kicked? No one talked to him, or even vaguely associated with him besides his siblings.  This small town wasn’t known for its tolerance of being different, and being both a carrier and homosexual? You might as well be the devil for all they cared.  Though considering his older brother was beloved by most of the school and his name was Lucifer, that might not be a good analogy.

“Eh-hem,” The teacher cleared her throat and glared at them before snapping, “Perhaps you’d like to tell the class what’s so much more interesting than trigonometry?”

“Just getting to know my fellow students,” Dean said with a cocky grin and quark of a brow, as if daring her to say another word.

“Hmph,” She turned back to the board and began lecturing again.

 

Sam anxiously took his seat and got out his notebook, trying to avoid attention as he quickly jotted down every word the teacher was saying.  One of the cheerleaders from earlier sat to his left kept looking over with those pale eyes and frankly Sam was starting to get a bit unnerved when the teacher started assigning a project.

“Jessica?” The teacher asked the girl who smiled back and happily replied.

“Yes, Mr. Morison?”

“Perhaps you’d like to work with Sam, show him the ropes and everything?”

“Can do!” She said, turning so that her desked touched his.

“Hi, my name’s Jessica, that older boy with you this morning, was he your brother?” She asked quickly but didn’t pause for breath before continueing, “Where did you live before you moved here? Do you have any pets? I have a dog, a cat, three fish, and my sister has a ferret, but I don’t like the ferret, he’s mean.  I bet you’re great at English, you have that ‘booky’ kind of look. I’m not so good with English, maybe you could tutor me sometime?”

“Gosh, Jess, let the poor boy get a word in,” Another girl teased, pushing playfully on Jessica’s shoulder as her face turned bright red.

“Sorry, I tend to get really excited easily,” She murmured.

“It’s ok,” Sam said, surprisingly jovial.  Jessica reminded him of a puppy, and her grin was infectious, “I’m Sam.  Yeah he’s my big brother, Dean. No. That’s cool, too bad about the ferret. Yeah it’s my favorite subject, and sure,”

“Awesome!”

 

“So, Cas,” Dean said when the bell finally rung, “What’s your next class?”

“Merryweather, French,” Castiel said, unnerved by Dean’s attention.

“Me too,” Dean said with a huge grin, “Walk with me?”

“Sure,” Castiel slowly replied, wincing internally but mentally preparing himself for what he knew was going to unfold along the way.   Better Dean realize what he was messing with now rather than down the road, “I just need to stop by my locker,”

“Lead the way,” Dean said with a gestering hand and a laugh.

Castiel tried to ignore the snickering of the students they passed, the way people were purposefully going out of their way to bump into him, and one even did so to the point where his books dropped to the floor as the guy whispered a slur so low Castiel thought he was the only one to hear it.  To his abject horror Dean grabbed the guy and spun him around when Cas went to pick up his books.

“What the hell did you just say?” Dean spit out slamming the guy into the closest locker and ignoring everything else.

“I said,” The muscular brute growled, “Fucking. Fags.”

Castiel almost didn’t believe it when Dean let loose his fist straight into the Jock’s nose, or the metallic smelling blood that poured out of the broken appendage.  He just stood there, stunned, watching as the two boys got into it, kicking and hitting, though Dean had a significant upper hand.  Finally the Jock heeled, and Dean pushed him to the floor.

His gaze was finally wrought from the scene as the principle pushed through the crowd of students and grabbed both him and Dean by the arm, dragging them to his office.

 

“Wonder what’s going on?” Sam whispered to Jess as they saw the huge blockade of students flooding the hallway.

“Who knows?” Jessica shrugged, pulling him back, “We’d better not get involved, come on, I know another way around,”

 

The nurse puttered about her little office looking between the two injured boys, annoyed at both’s insistence that they were fine.  Castiel sat next to Dean looking vaguely nauseous, but she couldn’t care less about that.  The principle was yelling about expectations and expulsions, not that Dean was paying any attention.

He was puzzled, while yeah he had a temper he’d never gone off like that before over some stupid jerk with a chip on his shoulder.  Something about Cas though, it just got under his skin in the best and worst ways.  For the life of him, though, Dean Winchester couldn’t figure out why.

In the end the two boys got off with a few days in detention and Cas with a warning which only served to piss Dean off farther.  Cas hadn’t done anything but be bullied. By the end of the day though the whole thing was just a passing memory as the two boys discovered they had nearly identical schedules save for Dean taking PE and Cas opting for Vocal Arts.

“Hey, you free Friday night?” Dean asked as they waited in front of the building for Sam to come out and Cas’ older brothers to show up.

“Yes,” Castiel said with a smile, more happy than he’d been in… years.  He had a friend, who’d actually stuck up for him.  It didn’t hurt that Dean Winchester made his stomach a butterfly farm and his heart pick up the pace like he was running a marathon.  Dare he even hope that maybe Dean liked him too?

“Cool,” Dean said just as Cas spotted his brothers and Sam came out the door, talking excitedly with a short cheerleader, “How about a movie? I could pick you and we could catch whatever’s around say, 8?”

“Yeah, that sounds great,” Castiel blushed, “There’s my brothers so I should go,”

“See ya, Cas,”

 

“Who was that, Dean?” Sam asked coming up to where his brother lounged against the building.

“Ah, just a guy I’m getting to know, Castiel,” Dean said, musing up Sam’s hair, “Who’s your girlfriend?”

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Sam growled, “And her name is Jessica, she lives down the road from our motel so I figured it’d be cool if I went over to her place.  We have a project in-”

“Sammy,” Dean laughed, “It’s ok, you’re in the 9th grade now, you can go hang with your new friend.  Just be back by dark,”

“Thanks,” Sammy said, distracted when Jessica pulled on his shirt whispering that her mom was here, “See ya,”

“Oh and Sammy!” Dean called out to his brother’s retreating figure, “Be careful!”

 

“Who was that, Castiel?” Michael asked pulling away from the school and heading towards their families mansion on the outskirts of town.

“Yeah Cassi, spill,” Gabriel poked him.

“Please Gabriel, leave it alone,” Castiel said closing his eyes and breathing deep, “I don’t want you four running him off like last time,”

“Last time the guy was a megalomaniac, closeted, abusive asshole who covered you in bruises, Castiel,” Michael said, gripping the steering wheel tight at the memory, “We are merely concerned for your well being,”

“You don’t have to be,” Castiel said smiling as he related the early morning incident to his brothers.

“Whoooa,” Balthazar whistled, “Not bad, Cassi,”

“Just be certain he has no ill will towards you,” Lucifer added helpfully, “Might I suggest we meet with him first-”

“No!” Castiel groaned out, “Don’t go anywhere near him, Luce, that goes for you three too,”

“It was just a suggestion,” Lucifer pouted, crossing his arms and slumping down in the front seat.

 

Later that night, long after Sammy had gotten home and fell asleep, Dean laid down in his bed under the covers with his lips pressed tightly together.  He palmed the erection that had sprung up unexpectedly a few hours earlier and had since refused to go away.  His breath came in small little pants as he pressed hard against it before spit slicked beneath his boxers.  He ran his hand from base to tip slowly, swirling a dot of pre-cum around the tip as he brought to mind an image of Cas, with those blue eyes looking up at him as he sucked his cock, those pale pink, horribly kissable lips all streached and bruised as Dean fucked his face.

Dean bit his lip as he came quicker than usual, wiping his hand off on the sheets as he drifted off into sleep, unaware that on the other side of town Cas was doing the same thing.


	2. Chapter 2

01\. What Is This Feeling, So Sudden and New?

 

The next couple of days passed by in a pleasurable blur for both boys.  Dean and Cas talking a lot and finding out they really did click, and Sam finding that he really enjoyed Jessica’s company.  By the time Friday night rolled around Dean was ready to just push Cas against a wall and kiss him senseless.  Jessica was apparently coming over to the Motel to hang out with Sammy, which had caused Dean to tease him senseless all day before handing him a condom on the way out the door with a chuckled, “Have fun!”

Dean followed Cas’ instructions out of town and found himself at a gate.

With an intercom.

“Hello?” He asked, pushing the button.

“Yes,” A stately voice replied with just a hint of a British accent, “Who would this be?”

“Uh, Dean Winchester.  I must have the wrong-”

“Ah yes, Mr. Winchester, please proceed,”

The gate swung open as Dean’s jaw dropped.   He continued up the landscaped driveway for a good mile before coming upon the largest house, if it even classified that at three stories high and easily a football field long, he’d ever seen.  He just stopped in front of what he hoped was the main door and sat in the beat-up old clunker that his dad and rented for him to use while he was gone with the impala.  He reached besides him and grabbed out a cigarette, lighting it up while he mentally prepared himself.

Inside Castiel paced the foyer anxiously as he waited for Dean to come up to the door.  Lucifer was lounging, wanting to get a closer look at the man who had his littlest brother so tied up in knots.  The others were peeking over stairwells and behind doors.  All of it made Castiel even more nervous.

“Could you all please not?” He begged.

“We are merely worried, Castiel,” Lucifer said softly, “We mean this… Dean, no harm,”

“Meaning to and ending up doing it anyways are two completely separate things,”

“True,”

Finally a knock sounded at the door and Castiel rushed to get it, opening to find a gorgeous sight before him.  Dean was wearing hip-hugging jeans that had seen better days, but the rips showed tantalizing glimpses of tan and freckled flesh.  A butter-soft leather jacket covered widening shoulders over a black and nearly indecently tight shirt.  It all made Castiel feel over-dressed in nice jeans and a button up, he’d even opted for a tie, though it was crooked and in his worry had been pulled a bit loose.  Dean didn’t seem to mind though as his kelly-green eyes appeared to undress him and devour what he saw all at the same time.

Castiel licked his lips as he awkwardly waved Dean in, “Hi, uhm, you wanna come in?”

“Nah, I have a night all planned out,” Dean chuckled, a hint of nerves in the tone that helped sooth Castiel’s own, “You ready?”

“Yeah,” Castiel said quickly, stepping out and calling over his shoulder, “Bye!”

“Have fun, Castiel, be back before too late,” Lucifer called out, eyes studying Dean like mouse in a maze.

Castiel got into the car, and buckled up as Dean pulled out and onto the road back towards town.  It was quiet, just the sound of the local classic rock station playing softly in the background while they sat in companionable silence.  Finally Castiel gathered up the courage to ask,

“So, just what are we doing tonight?”

“Oh, I figured we could catch a flick at the drive-in then go get dinner somewhere,” Dean said, “I hear they’ve got that new slasher one, and there’s this little dive near where I stay that has the best bacon cheeseburgers in town,”

“Malonies?” Castiel asked.

“Yup!” Dean said with a laugh, “You like it too?”

“Oh yes, Father has the kitchen staff cook healthy food for us but I’m rather fond of cheeseburgers,”

“Kitchen staff,” Dean whistled, “Wow, so you guys must be loaded huh?”

“Oh yes, Father’s always been rather wealthy,” Castiel said, smiling at the thought of his loving if often absent father, “He’s not home much, but I’ve never minded I have a lot of siblings so the house is always full and loud, and even the staff are very nice,”

“Hmm,” Dean hummed, pulling into the drive-thru movie park and handing the cash to the person, ignoring it when Castiel tried to pay, “Hey, I invited you, remember? I pay,”

“Oh ok,” Castiel said, stuffing his wallet back in the back pocket of his jeans.  They pulled forward and parked just as the previews started to come on and they got the speaker all hooked up.  The car was very old, and instead of a divide between the front two seats there was a third seat, and when, as the movie began to get good, Dean put his arm up behind Cas, Castiel slid over so that he was tucked under Dean’s arm as the Serial killer began his murder spree.

Cas ended up cuddled into Deans side and hiding his face in his chest, inhaling the musk and evergreen forest scent he was starting to associate with being purely Dean.  They left after the credits, waiting for the traffic to die down before leaving.  Cas stayed where he was though, and felt his heart beat a staccato beat against his ribs the entire way to Melonie’s.

 

“H-hi, Jessica,” Sam stammered out as he opened the door and let his friend through.

“Hi, Sam!” She replied brightly putting her purse down on one of the bed’s – Sam’s thankfully – and began to make herself at home.  Grabbing the remote and flicking on the TV, surfing through the channels while Sam sat down next to her.  They chatted and only payed minimal attention to the drama unfolding on the screen.  Unaware that they were getting closer and closer until she finally bridged the gap and kissed Sam.

Surprised Sam pulled away stuttering, “Uh-uhm-ugh-oh”

“What?” Jessica asked, a little hurt, “Oh, you don’t like-”

“No! I do like you! I do! It’s just… you surprised me, is all,” Sam rushed to say and then, exasperated at himself and desperate to fix it, kissed her again, softly.

 

Dean smiled widely watching as Castiel devoured his third burger with vigor, laughing at the squirt of ketchup that painted the side of his lips and without thinking he leaned over and licked it off, causing Castiel to gasp giving Dean the perfect opening to kiss him fully like he’d wanted to for what seemed like an eternity of Sundays.  He used everything in his arsenal and when they parted Castiel was breathless and his eyes fogged with desire, darkened and damn near sinful. Dean threw enough money to cover the bill on the table and left, pulling Castiel along with him to the car.

Castiel wasn’t surprised when he pushed him to the hood, kissing him senseless once again before they rushed into the car and sped out of town.  Castiel directing Dean to an old abandoned farm.  Dean hauled Cas across the seat the moment the car was in park, pulling him into his lap and grinding their erections together as he roughly bit and kissed those lips that had been driving him crazy.

Dean ripped open Cas’ shirt and pulled the tie off roughly, uncaring of how it would look when they were done as his lips and teeth trailed down the pale and beautifully arched neck presented to him until it was just a mass of marks, his marks, put on Cas were everyone could see.  A heady scent began to fill the car, driving Dean out of his mind as Cas mewled and arched, fucking _begging_ for more.

But Dean didn’t have enough room to do what he wanted so he roughly opened the door and practically carried Cas out of it until he was laid against the cool hood of the car.  Dean continued his passage down, driving Cas more and more out of control as his hips jerked, moving of their own volition.

Castiel nearly screamed when Dean mouthed his erection through the hard press of his jeans.  He could feel slick leaking from his hole and down his thighs, a clear sign of the genetic mutation found in his DNA.  Right now though Castiel couldn’t think of that, all he could think of was getting more of Dean’s mouth on his body, particularly his cock.

“Dean,” He gasped out in between frantic breaths, “ _Please,_ ”

“Hmm? What is it Pretty Baby?” Dean’s voice was low and wrapped around Castiel like melted dark chocolate, “What is it you want, I wonder,”

“Dean!” Castiel screamed, out of his mind at the feelings coursing through him, “Please! Don’t tease, just… ahhhhhh!”

Dean had taken Castiel’s jeans in hand pulled down roughly, taking his boxers with him and revealing his hot and angry cock which was topped with most beautiful little drop of pearlescent pre-cum.  Dean dived right in, sucking hard and burying his face until his nose brushed Cas’ pelvic bone, holding him by those slim, made-for-fucking hips.  The sounds exploding from Cas’ mouth were barely understandable, whimpers and sighs and screams all a perfect symphony to Dean’s ears as he swirled his tongue from base to tip and back down again, getting back up just in time to capture Cas’ cum on his tongue the flavor surprisingly sweet if tart and undeniably _Cas._

Dean’s hands wandered then to Cas’ ass and found the leaking wetness there causing his cock to throb.

_Yesssss._

Dean popped off of Cas’ cock with an obscene sound then stood up, kissing the still panting youth who’s erection had yet to go down.  Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean, still whimpering and desperate, hooking a leg around Dean’s so he could thrust against the still fully clothed boy as his hands made quick work of shoving his jacket off so he could strip off his shirt.

Dean’s hands went back to Cas’ ass, helping the smaller boy grind against him, leaving a damp spot on his thigh.

“Mmm,” Dean whispered into Castiel ear, purposefully dropping an octave and giving his words a slight drawl, “What do you want?”

“F-fuck me, pleeeease Dean,” Castiel managed to beg, trying his best not to let the fires rushing through every capillary in his body completely consume him.  Dean growled and spun him around and forced his head down to the car, pulling his legs apart to watch, mesmerized, as a drop of slick made its way down Cas’ inner thigh.

“Damn Cas, You’re so fucking pretty like this, hole leaking and clenching.  Just begging to be filled and pounded like a little whore, aren’t you?”  Dean said, grinding his jeans into Cas’ ass as he unbuckled them, peeling the too tight material apart enough to release his straining erection.  He held Cas down with one hand in the middle of his back as the other sought out that sweet pink hole and thrust in roughly, quickly adding another and another until Cas was just a screaming mess around him, all begs and pleas.  Dean managed to zero in on his gland as he leaned over and whispered, “Fuck man, I don’t know if three’s gonna be enough to stretch you out, you’re so tight and baby I’m not small,”

“Just forget about prepairing me and FUCK ME ALREADY!” Castiel ended in a scream as Dean pushed the head of his erection past that first muscle and didn’t stop until he was buried balls deep in Cas’ wet tight hole.  He stilled for a moment, giving Cas a chance to adjust before pulling out and slamming back in savagely.  He kept one hand on Cas’ back and used the other on his hip, holding him so hard that there were bound to be bruises on the fair skin the next morning.

Cas was rendered speechless, thankful that Dean had given him a moment.  Cas had by no means been a virgin, but since pickings were slim in his tiny town, and the people there were not nearly as well endowed as Dean had proven to be, felt like he was being torn in two but the burn only served to heighten his pleasure.  Soon he was cumming again, tightening so much that Dean came just a moment later, panting as he leaned against Castiel’s back while their hearts returned to normal.  Cas could feel the flood of Dean’s come mixing with his slick in his passageway and realized that they’d forgotten one very important thing.

Apparently Dean realized it too.

“Fuck,”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please excuse both the tardiness and shortness of this chapter, sometimes I'll write one chapter five times before it's decent to post so... yeah.

02\. Revelations and Tragedy

Castiel and Dean did their best not to worry too awful much, the rate of Carriers who managed to get pregnant their first time was damn near zero, and they took multiple precautions from there on out.  So when a month passed and there were no symptoms the pretty much figured they were out of the ball park.  Dean’s father had called apologizing for the hunt taking so long and said he was on his way to get them, which beyond worried Castiel from what Dean had told him of his father.

“Don’t worry, Pretty Baby,” Dean said one night, kissing his hair as they lounged in the motel, taking advantage of Sam spending the night with Jessica at the local astronomy museum for some meteor shower show, “I’ll explain everything when he gets here, I’m not leaving you behind,”

Castiel couldn’t find the words to express how he was feeling, so he drew Dean down for a hunger-filled kiss, hoping that would say what he needed to.

 

John Winchester groaned as he pulled his battered body out of the Impala slowly, ready to grab Dean and Sam from the Motel and get back to Bobby’s.  This stupid hunt had taken far longer than he’s expected which was going to make Sam impossible to deal with for at least a week.  Heck after so long even Dean would be a tad attached to this place.  Shaking his head he opened the room door and flicked the lights on, smiling at the mass under the blankets, assuming that Sam had crawled into bed with Dean like he did when he was little as it still happened on rare occasions.

Pulling back the covers though proved to be very different.

“What the hell is going on here? Dean!” John pulled Dean and the other male from the bed and roughly shoved them to the floor.

Dean stuttered, stand up and holding up his hands and coming to stand between his father and boyfriend, “Dad, listen,”

“Where the fuck is Sammy? You know, the brother you’re supposed to be watching?”

“He’s out with a friend, he’s armed, he’ll be just fine for the night,” Dean said.

“And you,” John pointed to Castiel, who’s heart was nearly beating out of his chest, “Get the hell away from me and my boy you fag, I ever see you again and I’ll kill ya,”

Castiel just looked up at Dean as he climbed to shaky feet.  Dean mouthed, “I’ll call you,”

And poor Castiel.

He believed him then, and he never could give up hope.


	4. Chapter 4

03\. Let Your Past Be the Sound of Your Feet Upon The Ground.

A week went by with no word from Dean, and Castiel was beginning to get sick.  He prayed it was just with worry, but then a month was gone and he was puking several times a day.  Even his siblings began to realize that Castiel was only getting worse, he couldn’t keep anything down, he was crying all the time and recently his lower abdomen had become sore and had developed a pouch, like he’d been eating too much. 

“Castiel,” Anna gently said, coming into Castiel’s bathroom where he was resting against the floor, the smell of acid lingering in the air seemed almost permanent at this point, “Castiel we’re worried, I know you’re upset about Dean-”

Tear’s sprung to Castiel’s eyes at just the sound of his lover’s name.

“- but you need to see the doctor,” Anna finished, kneeling before her brother and petting his out of control hair, sending him as many good vibes as she could, “Michael and Lucifer agree,”

“What’s the point?!” Castiel sat up roughly, shoving her back, “One love, that’s the fucking Novak-Milton legacy, we fall helplessly in love with the first person to love us back and never love another… All of you encouraged me in this, said to take it and hold onto it… that it would be true, like you and Jo, and now he’s gone and it’s obvious that he’s never coming back so why-”

“Do you think we’re dumb?” Anna screamed, tears streaming down her face at the agony on her brother’s face, “Castiel you admitted to sleeping with him.  You’re pregnant, or you’re seriously ill, either way you need to see the doctor.  Now do you go on your own or do we force you?”

 

Jo stood outside Castiel’s bathroom with all her step-siblings, young and her age, as her wife talked with Cassi.  Finally he seemed to understand and Michael and Jo shared a look of relief.  Castiel came out allowing Anna to guide him with hands on his shoulders.  Jo blew a kiss at her wife who just gave her a sad smile, tears still glittering in the backs of her eyes.

“Come along, Castiel,” Lucifer and Michael said, taking Castiel from Anna, letting her go to Jo.  The ride to the doctor’s was uneventful, mostly just Lucifer and Michael trying to engage Castiel with little luck, but at one point Michael swore and Lucifer’s slightly reckless driving and Castiel grinned, even laughed just a hint, his hand wandering to his stomach before Castiel stared out the window the rest of the way.

 

“Will he be alright?” Jo asked later that night after Castiel came back with the news that he was in fact, pregnant.  Anna had thus been with him all day, reassuring him that the world hadn’t ended, even if it felt like it.

“I’m not sure… in the history of our family, since the two lines merged, this has never happened,” Anna sat down on their bed, watching Jo undress with worried eyes.

“Not once, hasn’t the line been Novak-Milton for centuries though?”

“Yes, that’s what’s worrying,” Anna said, walking up to Jo and into her arms, laying her head down on her breast and letting the familiar sound of Jo’s heartbeat reassure her, “I can’t find anything in the family archives, and father’s been so hard to get ahold of lately,”

“It’ll all be alright, I’m sure,” Jo said with a wicked grin as she swept a startled Anna up off her feet and threw her to the bed, “In the meantime…”

 

A few months later Castiel woke to a sharp jab against his bladder.  As usual.

“Oh, you guys just can’t give Mommy a break can you?” Castiel groaned but smiled, going to his feet and rubbing his back.  There was still a big gaping hole in his chest and life, but by focusing on going forward, he might just be alright.  He had other people to think about after all.  It wasn’t what he’d pictured for his life months ago when he’d met Dean Winchester, but if it was the best he would ever have… Castiel was content.


	5. Chapter 5

04\. Five Years Later

Dean’s hands shook as he drove into the town he never could forget.  Sam dozed next to him, college work book open on his lap and a high lighter hanging loosely from his teeth. By rather vague memories he drove through the town, passing the old high school that had since been closed and condemned, and finally found the only motel in town.  He hadn’t been back in five years, to the date, since his father had pulled him from town literally kicking and screaming.  Dean felt nauseated as he pulled into the motel parking lot, unsure if he was doing the right thing, or if he should just leave well enough alone.

“We here?” Sam yawned out as he woke up, the highlighter falling to make a bright yellow mark on the page below.

“Yeah, we’re here,” _No turning back now._

“Aziraphel!” Castiel yelled up the stairwell of the once small diner that he’d turned into a bookshop.  His daughter bounded down the stairs, sleek back hair flowing behind her as she jumped into her mother’s arms.  The smile on her face reminding Castiel of his brother Gabriel after he played a trick on one of the younger siblings.  The analogy gave him enough time to sigh before he heard his son scream at the top of his lungs before Aniel ran down the stairs, a book clutched to his chest as he wrapped himself around Castiel’s legs.

“Aziraphel, what have I told you about upsetting your brother?” Castiel said putting her down so he could calm down a terrified Aniel.

“That it was mean,” She huffed out, rolling her grass-green eyes, “But all I did was show him the spiders,”

“The spiders, momma!” Aniel cried, burying his face in Castiel’s neck.

“Shhh, it’s alright sweety,” Castiel shushed him, giving Aziraphel a stern look and pointing to the corner, “Corner. Now. Ten minutes,”

“But Mom-”

“Now what has my favorite niece done to deserve such a harsh punishment,” Gabriel laughed from behind Castiel, who was doing his best not to give into the urge to seriously harm his elder brother.

“Gabby!” Aziraphel cried out running to him and laughing as he picked her up and swung her around, “I just showed Aniel the spiders that have been building a web in my half of the room,”

“Spiders, huh?” Gabriel said in return, “Neat,”

“Gabriel,” Castiel said warningly.

“Ok, kiddo, better go serve your time before mommy decides to feed me to the spiders,”

Aziraphel skipped off to the corner and stood there humming as Castiel put Aniel down, “How about you go look through our new shipment and see if there’s anything you’d like?”

Aniel wiped the tears from his face and nodded, seemingly always knotted blond hair flopping in his face, “Ok Mommy,”

“That is one weird kid you got, brother,” Gabriel teased, giving Castiel a hug.

“He’s not weird,” Castiel replied, “He merely enjoys reading instead of pranking,”

“Like I said, Weirrrrd,”

 

“What are we doing here Dean? I mean honestly,” Sam said after settling his things away and sitting on the bed, “I know this town, there’s no college anywhere near for me to visit,”

“I…” Dean stopped at Sam’s face, “I just wanna find out what happened. After we left, you know?”

“What’s it even matter, we were only here for a little while,” Sam argued, not wanting to think of that night, or the friends lost.

“It matters, Ok Sammy?” Dean snapped out, shoving a drawer close, “Now, you get with the studying, I’ll be back in a bit,”

The town really hadn’t changed all that much, there was a new bookshop where that diner that he’d been to that first wonderful night with Castiel.  Caught off guard with the thought he found his feet leading him in the shop, only realizing it when the door opening sounded a bell and he stepped in, staring around at all the book before looking down at…

Children?

 

“Hello, Sir,” Aziraphel said with a large grin, “We’re not open… The sign even says so,”

Aniel just nodded, pointing to the door before scooting behind his sister.

“Oh,” Dean said, just staring.  Something was off here, but he couldn’t place it, in the meantime he probably shouldn’t hang around, “Alright, I’ll just, come back when it’s open then,”

“Sounds good, Sir,” Aziraphel laughed, pushing open the door as Dean walked out.

Dean stood on the sidewalk for a moment before moving on, shaking his head and muttering, “Weird,”

 

“Who was that?” Castiel said, coming down the stairs with Gabriel in tow.

“Just a man, he said he’d come back when we were open Momma,” Aniel said, sticking his thumb in his mouth before smiling, “Maybe he’ll buy some books,”

“Maybe,” Castiel said, “How about going to go see Aunty Anna and Jo?”

“Yay!”

 

Dean didn’t find out anything the whole day and as he walked back to the Motel he wanted to cry.  Something that hadn’t happened in years.  The streets were dark and lifeless, most of the street lights had stopped working and he found himself caressing the gun resting between the back of his jeans and his lower back.  A light flickered on ahead of him and he saw a hand flip the sign of the shop he’d been in earlier.  Remembering the eerie children he straightened up and entered.  Sam was dying for a new book anyways.


	6. Chapter 6

05\. God is gone, now who’ll take his sins?

Castiel had just finished putting the new books on the shelves when the bell over the door let out its melodic tinkling.  He smiled and went to see who it was, calling out, “Coming!”

Whatever he’d been suspecting though, it wasn’t what he saw.  Castiel had to blink for a few moments, frozen at the sight of a man he’d though long gone ages ago as tears welled up, unwelcome and unwanted in his eyes.  His throat went dry, a lump forming and his heart seemed to beat a stacotto drum line in his chest.

Dean Winchester.

There was no denying that it was him, that profile was one that still haunted Castiel’s dreams at night and even during the day when Aziraphel tilted her head just so, or when Aniel rolled his eyes.  Eternity seemed to tick by in what Castiel knew was just a few seconds until Dean turned his head and stilled as well, green eyes going wide and mouth forming an ‘O’.

“Cas?”

“Hello Dean,” Castiel wasn’t sure how he managed to get that out without stammering, or fainting.

“Cas,” Dean smiled, “I… Hi,”

“What are you doing here Dean?”

At least Dean had the decency to blush; looking around the shop as he tried to put into words what had drove him from Souix Falls with his little brother, chasing a personal demon that had led him here to the angel of his dreams, “I, well, I had to know,”

“Know what,” Castiel said, startled by the venom in his disbelieving voice, “What happened to me after you left? Promising to call but I never heard one word… not one, and now you just show up four years later?”

“Cas-”

“Don’t call me that! My name is Castiel!” Castiel ended up screaming at the end, tears falling like crystals from his eyes, “You lost the right to call me that,”

“Cas- Castiel,” Dean tried to walk towards him, torn and horrified, but mostly disgusted at himself, “Please let me explain,”

“Save it, Dean, I don’t want to hear your excuses,” Castiel grabbed the closest bookcase, “Please just leave,”

“I’m not gonna do that Cas,” Dean said, his own tears starting to gather at the sight of Cas, looking so broken, so lost, all because of him.

Castiel let out a self-disparaging laugh, “No, of course not,”

“He threatened to take Sam, Cas, If I ever tried to contact you again,” Dean managed to get out over the otherwise silent tears streaking down his cheeks.

“I was pregnant,” Castiel yelled, “You left me, pregnant, without a word, Dean! Fuck you!”

Dean got so still, not even daring to breathe, fairly sure even his heart had stopped, “What?”

“I was pregnant, Dean,” Castiel said, haunted blue eyes meeting Dean’s, “I had to go through that, alone, without you,”

“Cas… I’m so sorry,” Dean suddenly moved going to wrap his arms around Cas, putting his head on top of Cas’ and inhaling that fresh-rain and cut-grass scent that was uniquely Cas’, the one that he had never stopped thinking about.

“Sorry doesn’t change the past, Dean,” Castiel said, pulling away, “Nothing can,”

“Then let me… Damn it Cas,” Dean ran a hand through his hair, looking around the small shop as he tried desperately to gather his wits, “I never meant for any of this to happen… I didn’t know he’d react that way, and I couldn’t leave Sammy, I tried to call you but he found me… Knowing what he was capable of… I couldn’t risk something happening to Sammy,”

“I understand Dean,” Castiel said slowly, closing his eyes at the knowledge that the boy he’d given his heart and soul to hadn’t felt the same.

“I never stopped thinking of you though, now Sammy’s gonna go to college… My dad was … he died, so I figured it was safe to come back,” Dean back away, the knowledge of just what he’d done to such a sweet person weighing heavily on his heart, “I… If you really want me to leave I will, whatever you want Cas, but… I know I can’t make it right but I’d really like it if you’d at least let me try,”

“How?”

“I don’t know, but Cas, I want to try… I… I missed you,” Dean breathed deep, closing his eyes, “I loved you and… I never really stopped, but I couldn’t risk Sam, couldn’t risk that he’d come take it out on YOU,”

Castiel sobbed at that, putting a hand to his heart, unsure how he could still feel so much pain.  He just nodded, letting Dean wrap him in his arms again as they cried together.  For the years, the pain, everything.

 

Sam had gotten bored in the Motel and opted to going out for dinner, landing himself at some family owned pizzeria.  He smiled at the hostess as she sat him down at a booth, they were busy so he settled in for a wait for the waitress, surprised to hear a familiar voice squeal.

“I don’t believe this! Sam?” It was the waitress, with blonde hair and freckles and pale yellow eyes.

“Jessica?” Sam said, his face splitting into a wide smile as he got up to hug her.

“It is you! Oh my god, what happened, your dad came one day and you guys just left!”

“Yeah, it uh, it’s complicated,” Sam said.

Someone yelled and Jessica looked behind her, “I gotta get back to work, but I get off in an hour, wait for me?”

“Absolutely,”

 

“So what’s his… or her’s name?” Dean asked after they settled down upstairs where Cas and the kids lived, at the small dinner table.  He was nervously peeling the label off a beer while Cas puttered about making himself a cup of tea.

“Both, actually,” Castiel said, a fond smile overtaking his face, “A girl and a boy. Twins.”

“Oh, so what’s their names?”

“Aziraphel and Aniel,” Castiel said as he sat down just as a tinkling echoed up from downstairs, “Speak of the devils,”

“Wait, they’re here?” Dean paniced, it was one thing to find out you were a dad, another to suddenly have to face it, “Now?”

“Better sooner than later,” Castiel shrugged, a part of him dreading this while another part of him gloried in the fact that he’d get to introduce his children to their father, someone they’d always asked about.

At first Castiel had just said that he was away, but as they were growing they started asking where, and when he was coming back.  Despite his own problems with Dean, Castiel wouldn’t poison them against him and had simply said that he’d had to leave and that he loved them very much and doubtlessly wanted to be there with them, but he couldn’t.

“Castiel?” Anna called out as they came up the stairs, “You left the shop-” She stopped as she came into the room, a sleepy Aniel in her arms with Aziraphel clinging to her legs.

“Hey Anna,” Castiel got up and took Aniel, who was suddenly very interested in what had the adults all riled up, “Thanks, I’ll call you later ok?”

“Alright, but Cassi, Michael and Lucifer aren’t going to like this,”

“I don’t care what Michael and Lucifer like or don’t like, he has a right to know them and be in their lives,”

“Ok, I’ll talk to you later, Jo’s in the car waiting,”

Once Anna left Aziraphel went up to Dean and stared at him while Aniel remarked, “Mommy, it’s the man from earlier, what’s he doing here?”

“Well,” Castiel said bringing him over and putting him down next to his sister, “Remember how I said Daddy had to leave us, but he didn’t want to?”

“Yes?”

“Well, he doesn’t have to be gone anymore, and he’s come back,”

“Does that mean…?” Aziraphel asked, unusually reserved.

“Yes,” Dean managed to get out, going to his knee’s in front of them and trying to keep his tears at bay, “Hi sweety,”

“Daddy!” Aniel cried out wrapping his arms around Dean, burying his face in his neck, “You’re really here!”

Aziraphel just kinda looked at Dean before slowly holding her arms out. Dean grabbed her to and hid his face in their hair as he just cried and held them tightly.

 

“Hey, you ready?” Jessica asked, coming out of the restaurant an hour later.

“Yeah, what do you want to do?” Sam asked, looking down at his friend.

“We could go to the old school, it’s super scary and some kids say it’s even haunted,” She laughed, “Or we could just walk around and talk, find out whats been going on, other than your obvious growth spurt,”

Sam blushed and kicked the ground, “Oh yeah uh… it just sorta… happened,”

Jessica laughed again and wrapped her arm through his as they started to walk; they talked and talked as they walked through town, ending up back at Sam’s motel.  Sam didn’t remember the last time he laughed so hard, not since leaving four years prior.

“You wanna, uh, come in?” Sam gestered to the door, his mouth strangly dry as he waited for her to answer.

“You know what, I’d love to, but it’s late and I have work again in the morning,”

“Oh, right, yeah I totally get th-” Sam was abruptly shut up by Jessica leaning up and kissing him straight on the mouth.  They parted breathlessly a few minutes later, “See ya, Winchester, don’t disappear this time, yeah?”

Sam just watched her walk away for a moment before calling out, “I won’t!”

 

An hour later and Dean helped Cas tuck the twins into bed, surprised when Aniel didn’t want to let go.

“Come on, Ani, it’s past you two’s bed time,” Cas said.

“Will you be here when I wake up?” Aniel just asked Dean, Aziraphel looked over, interested in the answer as well.

“I… uh…” Dean looked frantically to Cas for help.  Cas just smiled and nodded.

“Yeah, I’ll be here,”

Aniel smiled, laying back into his bed as his mom and dad tucked him in before turning the light out and headed back into the living area.  Dean collapsed on the couch, and Castiel sat besides him.

“You’re good with them,” Castiel whispered.

“I don’t know what I’m doing,” Dean countered, wiping his face with his hands.

“You’re loving them, and I’ve found that… most of the time that’s all they need,” Castiel said standing up again, “They normally get up around 9 in the morning, if you are going to be here when they wake up… or you could just crash here on the couch tonight,”

“Yeah, uhm…” Dean looked at Cas’ strangely hopeful eyes, “I’ll stay here, just let me call Sam to tell him,”

“Ok, I’ll get you a blanket and a pillow,”

“Cas,” Dean called out, “Thank you, for letting me… in, again,”

“Just don’t do that to me again,” Cas said slowly, after a minute, “Please,”

“Never,” Dean said, going to him and hugging him before laying a gentle and chaste kiss on his lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for all the awesome comments! They really make my day to know how you guys feel about how i'm writing. I'm going to try and be better about updating but my laptop is currently broken at the moment so i'm rather limited as to my computer time right now, but I do promise at least one a week!


	7. Karma

Cas' couch sucked.  Coming from someone who grew up on shitty motel beds and cabin floors with just his clothes to soften the feel, that was saying something.  Dean felt, more than saw, the three pairs of curious eyes following his trek to the restroom as he groaned rubbing his back.  Back in the kitchen Aniel passed another egg to Castiel as Aziraphel made a mess whipping the omelet mixture.  Watching it for a moment brought tears to Dean's eyes, wondering just how much he'd missed that he'd never get back again.  Dean understood Sam's bitching from all those years, for normal, for white-picket fences and apple pie, no monsters to chase just a man to woo again and children to get to know.  He could do this.

Right?

Aniel turned around and gestered for Dean to join them, laughing when he did - picking Aniel up along the way and wrapping an arm around Cas and 'Zira.  They'd just gotten everything on the table and had sat down when the door downstairs started banging.  Voices called through the wood and made Castiel freeze, breakfast forgotten.

"Castiel Milton-Novak! Open up now!" Michael called out quickly followed by Lucifer.

"Or send  _Him_ out.  Either shall work!"

"Momma?" Aniel asked slightly frightened, he'd never heard any of his uncles this enraged, even when Gabriel dyed Zachariahs hair bright green.

"You guys stay here," Dean said, standing up, "Nothing I can't handle,"

"Dean-" Castiel started, blocking Dean at the stair door.

"Cas," Dean replied, cutting him off, "No offence but if someone had put Sammy in this position, then just popped back five years later i'd be plenty pissed off too.  Better we get this done and over with,"

"Two - or more, god only knows how many of my brothers and sisters are down there - against one though?" Cas snapped back, following Dean down the stairs, "I don't think so, not in front of my shop and certainly not infront of my... our, kids,"

"You know you're kinda hot when you get all angry," Turning around suddenly Dean put his arms around Cas and backed him into the wall at the foot of the stairs, "Actually, make that really hot,"

"Dean Winchester-"

"Cas, no offence, but i've dealt with bigger baddies than your brothers, alright?"

"So? And what bigger baddies?"

Dean nearly groaned but managed to keep it back, "Cas, I swear, i'll tell you everything. Just not now, okay?"

Another round of blows hit the door of the shop and Castiel rolled his eyes, shaking his head as he headed back up the stairs, "Fine, but take it out back and when you get your ass handed to you, I did try to warn you,"

Dean squared his shoulders before opening the door and getting a sound right hook into his throat.


End file.
